www.jakefrancisart.com

Idealist:
You see those rabbits there? Yup, those ones. They were once known as "La grande terreurs de l'oreille" which loosely translates as "the big eared terrors." Well I defeated them, and not through your run-of-the-mill machete or gun, no sir. By using my charm, charisma and wit, I was able to get these big-toothed tyrants to simply lay down their aggression and happily peel the skins off their own backs. It was as if they were simply taking off a pair of socks. And that's nothing compared to the amount of awards I've gained for artistic excellence, which obviously brings a lot of media attention and women to my door (bedroom). It's got so crazy that I've started to actually hide £50 notes around galleries that I exhibit in - go ahead have a look next time! My gift to you.

Realist:
I am an inadequate artist who very occasionally, through the generosity of others, experiences mild success. Nothing makes me happier than seeing free tea or coffee in a waiting room.